News:

My short story “Swallowed” was posted for this month’s Crystal Lake Shallow Waters flash fiction contest, themed Trick ‘r Treat. So if spooky season doesn’t last long enough for you, celebrate an extended Halloween all through November with this month’s stories. ($5 tier and up)

Under Her Eye: A Woman in Poetry Showcase Vol II came out this week. Under Her Eye is a charity anthology of domestic horror poetry. A portion of the sales goes to an international organization to end violence against women. I don’t sell a ton of poetry (it’s a really difficult market), but I’m honored to have my poem “A Woman Possessed” as a part of this anthology.

I also received news that Dear Human at the Edge of Time, a collection of poems about climate change, received the 2023 Best Book Award in the Poetry Anthology category. My poem “Displaced” was a part of this one.

Sad news to report, though. Quill & Crow Publishing’s gothic horror magazine The Crow’s Quill is ending after December. They really helped give me my start with shorter pieces, so it’s disappointing that they’re closing. The zines should remain available for at least another year for 2022 issues and two years for 2023 issues, and they’re free to read.

In more sad news, that portfolio of some of the best poems I’ve written didn’t get taken up, but I did get a personalized note on one them, so that was decent. I had to sit in my unhappiness for a while and wrote another poem to feel better.

On the leg injury front, I continue to have improvement by following all my exercises, and I can tell the lower part of my lower leg is stronger than the last time I reached this point in my healing, but I’m still struggling with my gait while barefoot. I’m a hair away from normal, though, when I’m wearing shoes. I have new exercises to do, and I’ve been cleared to use the elliptical machine again for up to fifteen minutes every other day, which I’m super excited about.

My PT always exclaims how hyperflexible my feet are when I go up on my toes, unusually so, like ballerina feet, and he asks me if I’m hyperflexible everywhere else. I have some double-jointed fingers, but no. I’m just ridiculously elated that I’m flexible in at least one area of my body. Going the other way, flexing my toes back toward my knees, the foot on my injured leg only reaches half as far as my left, but it’s an improvement. It didn’t used to bend past ninety degrees at all.

Works in Progress:

I finished In the Dollhouse We All Wait on November 5, total word count of 116,160 words. It was significantly longer than anticipated, given that I’d forecast about 70-80K words. I’ll have to cut it down significantly, I think—at least under 90K if I want to try to send it off to places that accept extreme horror. But as I opined last time, I’m not sure how I feel about this story and how ugly it is in a very specific way. I accomplished certain things that I set out to do, among which was writing an absolutely awful woman villain, because we need more of them. Even so, I’m not sure what place this story has. However, sometimes writing something hits as more extreme than the reading of it, because I’m more immersed in the world rather than with a barrier of a page. In any case, I’m shelving it for a while to get other writing projects done, like I usually do with projects to get some perspective for edits.

The next day, I immediately turned around and started Lost & Alone, intending it to be the sixth book in the Meridian series under my other name, but I’d already anticipated that it might end up too short for the series. It would need to be at least above 70K after edits, during which I usually make significant cuts to the word count, and I’m not sure it’s even going to cross 60K here. If that’s the case, I’ll reconfigure it as a standalone novella. It’s the least Meridian-y of the Meridian novels, since it’s a prequel set well before Meridian becomes a bustling urban center. Like, oh no, I have a stray novella to sell…say it ain’t so.

It does mean that I’ll probably have to add another Meridian novel to my writing line-up this year as I wrap up my writing sabbatical, which is not ideal. Really wish I had another year to work on the long things on my docket, but I just don’t know how. I’m also dreading heading back into the general workforce. Despite ample evidence to the contrary, I tend to not feel like a competent and capable human being, so I’m worried I’m going to screw things up, on multiple levels.

As far as general NaNoWriMo word counts go, I’m at 48K and heading for crossing the 50K line today after finishing this post, which puts me on schedule with a little cushion, if needed.

Books I’m Reading:

IT by Stephen King
Discount Armageddon by Seanan McGuire
The First Five Minutes of the Apocalypse edited by Brandon Applegate
This World Belongs to Us edited by Michael W. Phillips, Jr.

Music I’m Listening To:

Nocturne playlist
Taylor Swift
Joanne by Lady Gaga
Jordin Sparks debut
Kerosene by Miranda Lambert
Kill the One You Love by GEMS
Kill the Sun by Xandria
Laced/Unlaced by Emilie Autumn
Princess Pepper playlists on YT
Don’t Panic! playlists on YT
My Witchy Diary playlists on YT

Things I’m Watching:

Exorcist: The Beginning
Alien vs. Predator
Blade
Blade II
Blade: Trinity
Halloween Wars series (completed)
Halloween Cookie Challenge series (completed)
Halloween Baking Championships series (completed)
Outrageous Pumpkins series (completed)
Great British Baking Show series
Buffy the Vampire Slayer series
Scream Queens series
Kitchen Nightmares series
Good Bones series
Hoarders series
Helix series
NCIS series

Poem of the Week:

sometimes i see her
the daughter that never will be
sometimes i argue with her
despair of what a bad mother i am
sometimes i hold her in my arms
after reading a book to her
that i always wanted to share
sometimes i want space from her
but then i remember that she
never was and never will be
and i’m sad i’ll never know her
she’ll always just be
a voice a baby a child
a teenager an adult
that could have been